Wednesday, 24 December 2014

Reflections on my punishment


Mistress and I discussed the other night’s 60-stroke caning and both agreed it was a good thing for our relationship. It was severe but any kind of discipline was well overdue and we needed something like this to put our DD regime back on track.

It helped Mistress re-assert her authority because to carry out such a disciplinary measure she needed to take complete control and, it allowed me to show my submission to her in the most extreme of situations. Had she wavered in the slightest I could have taken advantage but by maintaining her strict demeanour she showed is prepared to take no nonsense from me.

Mistress surprised me several times that night. Firstly we’d agreed to an evening of pleasurable exchanges – with more of a playful caning. I’ll admit my behavior on the previous two evenings wasn’t good but I was taken aback when it became apparent she intended to punish me.

Punishment, she said, helped reinstate our domestic discipline regime. It was, if you like, a short sharp boot-camp style shock.

The second surprise was the sheer weight she packs with each cane stroke now. I’ve said this before but it seems like she is becoming ever more proficient in her ‘duty.’ 

I’m also surprised by her enthusiasm for being my disciplinarian. She was genuinely frustrated when I’d brought things to halt on the previous night, complaining she was ‘just getting into my rhythm.’

And I was dismayed when, after handing out such an effective 36 strokes, she ordered me back over the bench for the final 24. In the past, she would have baulked at adding to such a heavily marked bottom. I think that showed he willingness to ensure my discipline was complete.

Later in bed that night, we cuddled and I asked her how she felt towards me when she was caning me and she replied: “It was something you needed to remind you of the pledge you took some time ago. I didn’t think we would achieve anything if I let you off lightly.”

But how did Mistress feel about me, wimpering after each stroke? Did she feel sorry for me – or was she happy to see me suffering, I wondered. Did she feel any disdain for this pathetic, wimpering creature before her?

“Not at all. I was focused on what I had to do. I love you dearly but you needed the discipline. I was surprised you took it so well. You still made a fuss, but nothing like I imagined you would. But it had to be done otherwise we’d both still be pussy footing around the issues.”

The issues she mentioned, being me not accepting Mistress’ authority, me not accepting her discipline – and me eroding Mistress’ confidence as a result.

“Perhaps we can treat this as a fresh start," she continued. "At least you now know the extent I am willing to punish you now if you are stupid enough to upset me. I think you can say Domestic Discipline is now reinstated in this house.”

With that statement, Mistress rolled over to sleep leaving me to analyse how I felt. My bottom still burned and throbbed. The cheeks were swollen considerably and felt very bruised and raw.

I surmised that I’d just experienced the most intense caning of my life. Even for a CP enthusiast like I’ve been for years, it wasn’t a pleasant experience but in many ways had been a gratifying one.

One of the most pleasing aspects was Mistress telling me I’d taken it better than she expected. I had tried so hard to control my reactions and emotions. But more important was that we had fully engaged our DD roles and, according to Mistress, had something to work on. I’m happy with that. I thrive on Mistress’ authority. I like the closeness it brings us and it’s great see Mistress thriving on her power.

How do I feel about the ever-present threat of the cane? On this most recent experience I’m ever more conscious of trying to avoid it’s searing sting. But the added zest of a DD lifestyle makes it worthwhile.
I’ll try to tell myself that the next time Mistress is strapping me to the bench.    

3 comments:

  1. Such an excellent post!! OMG it's like you put the words together that I need to tell my Mistress. I need what you received but I don't think I could take it if a cane was used. That being said, a punishment spanking beyond anything I have ever received I something I dread but know is needed.

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  2. "I was focused on what I had to do. I love you dearly but you needed the discipline." Women are so practical!

    I'm glad you got what you have been needing.

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  3. What sub hub in phx said...

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