Friday, 2 May 2014

Punishment delivered


I had my appointment with the cane last night and it was probably the worst thrashing I’ve ever experienced.

When I saw the mood Mistress came home in I knew I was going to suffer. She wasn’t angry – just in a very determined and aggressive mood, the like of which I’ve rarely seen in her. But when I do, I know to watch out.

There was no lecture, in fact virtually nothing was said apart from the order to bend over the bench which I’d readied.

But I was in a determined mood too. I wanted to get through what ever was coming with the minimum of fuss. The punishment, I told myself was thoroughly warranted and for once I was going to take it manfully.

Mistress broke that resolve within a few seconds. My punishment began with 12 strokes of the thick delrin cane we recently bought. By six of her full-blooded strokes I was begging for her to stop. The effects of this cane are like an amplified version of the thick Dragon – incredible thud with an intense sting that just keeps burning. Normally my whining would result in her just taking the edge off the force of each stroke – but not this time.

By the end of the 12 strokes I was whimpering and begging to be released and sweat was pouring off me.

Next came the thin Dragon. Again full force and virtually no respite between each batch of six. She gave me 24 in total and all through it I was begging for her to stop.

Mistress released me from the bench and told me I’d need to go and attend to my bottom, as there was blood.

And she added: “You are such a wimp. I’ve not even used full force on you yet. I was only just starting out too but clearly your weeks without discipline have let you soften up. Pack everything away. I’ve had enough of your wimpering. We’ll continue this some other time.”

She was right of course.

Rather than giving us both the emotional post -punishment high I think we were both deflated. Me, from failing miserably in my resolve. Her, for giving into to my wimpering once again.

I was really down afterwards and Mistress took my moping personally but I explained I was disappointed in myself for the way I behaved – not disappointed in her application of the cane, which I said, had been perfect. She told me not to worry, I’d have a chance to redeem myself over the next few days. She hadn’t finished with her canes.

Strangely, I felt good about that because I feared she’d had enough of my stupid ways. I think that underlines the issues I have with this whole CP thing. The pain was horrible this time – yet her I was fearing I might not experience it again.

Later in bed we cuddled up and I thanked Mistress for punishing me so effectively. She thought I was being insincere but I explained that I felt much happier now – closer to her, now that I’d had a chance to take in the experience and think about things. Truth was, I’d suddenly realized how significant the evening’s experience had been.

For years I’d wondered what it would be like to be caned way beyond my limits. It was always a goal of my to experience that. I don’t mean just pushing the limits a little – I mean where you truly don’t have any control and just have to take what’s coming.  Tonight’s experience was just that. It felt quite brutal – though I’m sure Mistress’ can strokes were well measured and they were certainly accurate - yet despite Mistress’ protestations that she wasn’t using full force, she’s never drawn blood like she did in that session.

And while I didn’t enjoy the experience itself, I explained to Mistress that I was now feeling much more malleable to her authority again. I said it felt like the cane had once again worked it’s magic.
But that’s not to say there weren’t issues. For one thing our ‘bench’ - a low, folding ladder – is far from ideal. I’m just not secured properly which allows me too much movement – to the point where it’s possible to almost stand upright mid-punishment.

I recall a professional disciplinarian once telling me how important she felt it was for her submissives to be comfortable over the bench, securely fastened. That way, she said, ‘they can focus fully on the punishment.’

I told Mistress this and she added, ‘and what’s more, it would leave the Mistress to focus on apply the cane with maximum force.’ We really must get something sorted.”

8 comments:

  1. I have to be honest, I am so happy that Mistress does not have a cane. I really related to your post and was hanging on every word. the idea that my Mistress would cane me to the point of bleeding is ... um ... scary. So scary in fact that I am hard as a rock as I write this.

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  2. My wife has drawn blood before. The first couple of times caused her apprehension. She stopped the first time and on the second she eased up.
    Now it doesn't faze her a bit.
    When I'm punished, its always restrained on the bed.
    If I thrash too much she will straddle my back and go to work on my butt with a bathbrush.

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  3. I’m tying to the spanking bench during the caning by mistress. My ass hurts until 3 days after the session and the beaten bottom area is more sensitive for a week but the discoloration of the skin remains more than a month. The skin with red stripes turns quasi black a few days afterwards, following the patches what turn green take shape, later they turn yellow and disappear then.
    It is advisable to pay attention to this, which goes to the swimming pool. The big green, yellow spots are already painless, but they are seen for a long time.

    I’m tying to the spanking bench during the caning by mistress. My ass hurts until 3 days after the session and the beaten bottom area is more sensitive for a week but the discoloration of the skin remains more than a month. The skin with red stripes turns quasi black a few days afterwards, following the patches what turn green take shape, later they turn yellow and disappear then.
    It is advisable to pay attention to this, which goes to the swimming pool. The big green, yellow spots are already painless, but they are seen for a long time.

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  4. So interesting. My real spanking experiences fall so far short of this. part of me dreads this level of punishment part of me craves it. Being spanked to tears is kind of the summit to me but maybe I'm stuck in the foothills. I draw much more extreme scenes than I've ever experienced as you can see on Strict Julie's blog.

    have you ever received a bent metal coathanger spanking? Intense stinging! I always think of a hot chilli pepper. also little effort for the spanker.

    good luck to you.

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  5. subhub: I wish sometimes Mistress didn’t have our collection of canes either. It’s not so much bleeding from cuts, it’s more grazing of the surface. I read somewhere that once the body starts to sweat, the surface gets sticky and adheres to the cane – hence the ‘grazing’. We don’t have a safe word but we’ve both agreed that if ever I do get cut, we stop immediately for safety’s sake.

    David: I think there’s a point where out good ladies decide that if there’s to be real punishment, there is no let up. I’m restrained because I find it impossible to take it without a fuss. I’m impressed by your wife’s methods. She clearly doesn’t let you get away with anything. I hate the bath brush more than I hate the cane!

    cromaH: Sounds like you have a strict Mistress. The other thing I noticed is that you may think the marks are fading but if you take a shower the heat seems to bring them back. Worth remembering if you shower at the gym and don’t want your secret out!

    Jo: I’ve been in contact with many others who crave severity but the reality is often too much for many of us. I always wanted to know what it was like to be punished way beyond my limits. Now I know. I just hope it’s not going to be the norm for Mistress to treat me this way – but I fear it will be. We’ve never used a metal coathanger and the thought fills me with dread. We prefer flexible objects, though having said that, there’s very little flex in our new delrin cane.

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  6. Dear Respecting Mistress,

    It is possible that you are right, the heat may be accelerated the conversion and absorption of hemoglobin. All biochemical processes accelerate due to the heat. However, the problem has two components. first, the "DAMAGES" should be reduced, which would mean cold wraps which have been available that the less liquid (including hemoglobin) to leak out of damaged blood vessels. The favorable effects only then could warm.
    However the doctors the so closed injuries were not interested since they heal sure. The doctors in jail of Singapore know it though, that the beaten a body part swells up, but they make only so much that the beaten prisoner get a bigger pants. They would have an opportunity to attempt to solve the problem.

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  7. I have a solid footstool bench in my bedroom for the tying up purpose. Mine is 1,5m long and 30cm high. I can tie my subs in a bend over-position or they can lie on top of it. The legs of the footstoll serves well for tying. The height is great to work with, i dont like to work low due to back problems. However if you buy one, make sure its solid and wont brake when the sub is struggling.

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    Replies
    1. Sounds like a great bench. We definitely need something that restricts my movements so that once the punishment is started, Mistress can deliver it uninterrupted.

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