Thursday, 24 February 2011

When Mistress is away – the sub will play…..

.…..But oh how he will pay later!

I hate it when Mistress is away on business. It’s so hard to focus without her here. She’s not one to get on my case, but somehow, when she is here, I buckle down to what needs doing – usually without question. It’s like being in tune to what’s needed and what my lovely lady desires.

I know what you are thinking, a good sub should know how to behave, with or without his mistress being present. I agree.

But maybe I don’t want to.

Generally, I get my work done, I get my chores done, I make contact with Mistress – but then I spend an inordinate amount of time on the internet. And enjoy doing so.

It allows me time to relax, catch up with the blogs I follow and explore a few new places too.
So why do I feel like I’m being unfaithful?

Is that why I do it?  

To incur the wrath?

Do any of you subs out there act like this, knowing the outcome isn’t going to be pleasant?

An evening of surfing does trigger powerful emotions and all I think about at such times is the severity of thrashing I would love to experience. I’m off in a fantasy world and I’m usually in a right state when I go to bed but the one rule I never, ever break is to relieve myself. That would be an act of unfaithfulness. Mistress might not have me locked in a chastity device but, as she’s said in the past, she decides when I orgasm. I have always respected that.

And of course, when it comes down to facing the prospect of a really severe thrashing, I will, as you all know, try anything to wriggle out of it!

Can anyone else relate to this?

I digress.

I’d also been away on business for a couple of days, but came home this afternoon and when I spoke to Mistress tonight, the first thing was a reprimand for not calling her all day.

I pointed out the hotel I stayed in had no reception from the rooms. She pointed out that I had gone outside last night to call her goodnight…so why didn’t I do the same first-thing this morning?

She was right of course. One black mark.

“So why didn’t you call this afternoon?

I explained I was driving.

“Well, you should have called before you set off then. You aren’t doing very well are you?”

That’s Mistresses way of telling me I’m in deep trouble.

“So what have you been doing since you got back?”

I could have lied and given a list of chores I’d done – and then rushed around tomorrow to make sure they were done. But while I might be a lousy sub, I can’t lie to Mistress. Honesty is another of our golden rules. So I explained I wanted to relax for a change and be fresh to start work tomorrow morning early.

“Hmmm, so you are sat at your computer surfing then.”

It wasn’t a question, a damning statement of fact. She knew exactly what I was doing.

“Oh dear, dear. You really aren’t doing very well are you?”

The phone went silent. Mistress was clearly awaiting a response. At least an apology. I wanted to say sorry but it felt like a pathetic offering for what was clearly very bad behaviour on my part. And I certainly didn’t have any excuses.

Eventually Mistress broke the ice – but it felt like hell freezing over.

“So you’ve actually done nothing since you got in – brought in the washing, put another load in, done the washing up, wrapped up that birthday present you have to send, dusted, hoovered, cleaned the bathroom?  There are plenty of things you could have been doing.”

It was humiliating being talked at like some naughty child – but that’s exactly what I was. I know that. You know that. And, if I’m honest, I rather enjoyed Mistress adopting her authoritarian attitude over the phone.
How do you feel when you mistress berates you?  Does it excite you? Or scare you? Or both? Or are you better behaved than me?

She was right of course. I had convinced myself nothing needed doing in order to satisfy my own little fancies. A good sub would have done all these things automatically before even thinking of his own pleasures.
The real problem I’ve created is that Mistress comes home tomorrow night and I won’t have been able to do all those chores by then. So, while I am doing them, it will impinge on our time together. She knows that. I know that. It’s just a shame I didn’t think of that when I sat down at the computer earlier tonight.
But it took that phone call to make me realise my folly.

Now I’ve got the black marks for missed phone call opportunities. I’ve got the black marks for surfing. And I’ve got black marks for not doing those chores. Even if I rush around and do them tomorrow, which I will, it’s too late.

I’m sure you’ll agree I deserve everything that’s coming my way.


  1. Hi Respect:

    Not only do you deserve it I have a feeling you will enjoy it! After getting over that initial feeling of "did I really sign up for this?" of course! ;-)

    Her Majesty sometimes goes away for weeks at a time and during those times she does not expect me to remain chaste. Faithful of course but not chaste. I surf the Internet to my heart's content. Indulge in Femdom erotica or whatever. But it gets old very quickly and I miss her like crazy. She is my best friend and my life partner in addition to being my Mistress. I don't like it when she goes away and I am always overjoyed to have her home again. It is a tremendous relief and a blessing to be able to worship at her feet again.

  2. I think we have all been in this situation. The two feelings I always have are disappointment that I have let her down and regret that it was preventable and it was my fault we are at that point.

    There is sometimes excitement because Newport is taking control, but it does not outweigh the regret I have.

    From your tone I know you regret your actions and I am sure that is the message you will recive from your mistress.

    On a lighter note remember that cleaning bathrooms take all your attention, but putting a load of laundry in the washer gives you 40 minutes of surfing time. Drying is even better, a full hour on the web.