Hello, I’m g’s Mistress and thought I’d offer my opinions of our FLR review. Back in July – at g’s suggestion – I agreed that instead of playing what amounted to CP games, I would assume control of the household and we would enter into an FLR. This is something g desperately wanted to experience and I’ve gone along with – though it’s been one heck of a learning curve for me.
When we set out I thought ‘if it makes him happy, then I’m happy too’ but I really quite enjoy having a degree of control over him. The most annoying thing when we just played occasional CP scenes was that we’d get everything planned for an evening and then g would find excuses not to bother. I reached a point where I told him either play to the rules you want, or we don’t play at all.
That’s when he came up with the suggestion of a most structured FLR. However, g has continued to be far too controlling, deciding when he wants to act out a submissive role and, if I’m totally honest, I’ve been far too lenient with him, until recently.
We’ve both been under a fair amount of pressure from work and health issues during the past year but now things have calmed down it’s allowing us both much more time to focus and for me to set g a routine. I think having a structure suits him a lot better so he knows exactly where his thoughts should be. So now, instead of coming home from work, having tea and then carrying on with his work, he comes home and focuses solely on our relationship.
g has always been far to lax with money and when we established the new FLR regime in July, it was a agreed that he would ask my permission before buying any luxury goods and he’d also be given a weekly allowance to buy his lunch etc. But, as I’ve just said, that’s still work in progress and I’ve told g that this will be one of our focuses after Christmas. I told him to think of it as his New Year’s resolution!
Back in July we decided that g would address me as Mistress when we are alone in the house and while he does do this, it still tends to be tongue in cheek – for which he gets punished. He’s still not yet at the stage where he comes home from work and immediately switches to a different environment and that’s something I’ve told him he has to change.
g spends a lot of time on the road, away from home and until we started this regime there was a total lack of communication once he left the house until he returned. At least he’s now calling me each day – and the calls give us some quality time, even though we’re sometimes hundreds of miles apart.
The one thing he is going to have to do more of in future is the household chores – and do them without being told. It’s a real bug-bear for me having to point out that he should be getting tea – or the house needs hoovering. We agreed before I’d supply him a daily list of chores, again something he wanted to be responsible for, but while I think he should have the gumption to work out for himself what needs doing, I think I’m going to have to do this for a while.
I thought g should dress as befits someone carry out household duties. Way before we met, he had a rubber/pvc rainwear/clothing fetish so we’ve focussed on that and now has a range of housecoats, aprons and panties, all in pvc or rubber that he wears most evenings. One thing I insist on now is that he always wears a pair of pvc bloomers when he’s at home. I think he enjoys the humiliation factor of being feminised.
We talked about a chastity device this evening. It’s something he’s mentioned before and he’s excited by the fantasy of being locked up but I get more pleasure from him living in fear of not being able to control his orgasms so I’ve told him to put his idea on hold.
One thing we agree in October was that punishment had to become more severe to have any effect. I was getting annoyed with his flippancy which was his way of asking me to beat him. As I said, when I’d tell him to get the cane, he came up with all sorts of excuses not to. That really upset me. I obviously wasn’t being severe enough so two things changed, I took a much more dominant role and he was no longer allowed to say no. I’ve also increased the severity of his punishment and that has helped reduce his controlling influence – though I’ve warned him, I can still pack a lot more power into my cane strokes if and when I need to.
Overall I think we’ve made steady progress since July and some big strides from October. There are obviously still a lot of things to discuss and develop but I think g is beginning to understand that he’s no longer going to be allowed to do what he wants, when he wants. I’m not saying I’m going to make his life hell, we’re in a loving relationship and both of us only want happiness for each other. But he has to remember that my needs come first and the relevant punishment will be administered if he fails to please me. After all, I’m only giving him the kind of lifestyle he’s been asking for.